In case you’re new, or just haven’t put all the pieces together, I’ll tell you a little bit about myself. I’m a 21 year old single girl who loves the Lord. I’ve never had a boyfriend, never even held hands with a guy. I didn’t grow up in a Christian home, but I think that’s even bigger evidence of God’s grace in my life, that He impressed His standards onto me by His Word and Spirit alone.
Up until halfway through my freshman year of college, I was one of those girls who really wanted a boyfriend, but knew it wasn’t going to happen. I was too busy to maintain a good relationship, and I knew I wanted a solid Christian boy and I didn’t want to kiss until I was sure he was really going to be special in the long run. As a public school kid, the prospects were slim.
And then God really began to work in my heart, and challenge me on why I even wanted this boyfriend. I couldn’t even see anyone who would meet my requirements, but I still wanted him. I began to realize that waiting for God to pick out the perfect man wasn’t all the Lord wanted from me. He didn’t just want me to wait for marriage to have sex. He was calling me to stop waiting.
Because this idea of waiting implies that something better is coming. It’s like you’re baking two desserts, but you’re only going to sample one of them. Oatmeal cookies come out of the oven, but the chocolate peanut butter cake is going in. Someone walks by and says, “Aren’t you going to eat a cookie?”, and you say, “No, I’m waiting for the cake”.
If Christ really is all you need to satisfy you, what are you waiting for? What is going to be better than Jesus? When I said I was waiting for a husband, I thought married life would be better than single life; I didn’t really think that Jesus alone could be better than Jesus plus a great husband.
But there are a few verses that radically changed my perspective:
In this [union and communion with Him] love is brought to completion and attains perfection with us… 1 John 4:17a
This one says that love is complete when we are in fellowship with Christ. That means we don’t need anything of anyone else – we already have the ability to know the best and deepest and most satisfying love that exists.
Then there are these selections from Psalm 16. It’s one of my favorite psalms and has been drastically changing my life for some time now:
I say to the Lord, “You are my Lord;
I have no good apart from you.” Verse 2
The Lord is my chosen portion and my cup;
you hold my lot. Verse 5
I have set the Lord always before me;
because he is at my right hand, I shall not be shaken. Verse 8
Therefore my heart is glad, and my whole being rejoices;
my flesh also dwells secure. Verse 9
You make known to me the path of life;
in your presence there is fullness of joy;
at your right hand are pleasures forevermore. Verse 11
I just want to encourage you to continue to ask yourself, “Is Jesus really enough for me? If I never got married, would my soul still rejoice in my first love?”